Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands
It’s time to come clean. I’m a closet Dr. Laura fan. If you stop and listen closely to what she has to say, she’s pretty spot on. Recently I picked up a copy of The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands and I’m blown away, ok absolutely blown away describes it better.
Before we go any further, I want to state that we are not having marital issues (OK Mother-In-Law, Mom and Friends), I just want to be a better wife. I know I’m not living up to my potential and change begins with me. 
CAN ANYONE SAY CONVICTION? I’ve always known that I take advantage of my dear husband, but I had no idea how detrimental my actions were to his wholeness. As you can see my husband has a very soft side. Is he perfect no, but neither am I (honey don’t use this against me later). So what can I do to make our marriage better?
As an introvert I tend to be pretty self absorbed in my own little world. I internalize, analyze and compartmentalize many of my feelings and life happenings on a daily basis. With this internalization, I tend be stressed and unapproachable…not to mention snippy with those closest to me. So little by little, I am working on being a little nicer to those around me, especially my husband, stepping out of my comfort zone a little more and trying to let things roll of my back (which in all honesty can be easier said than done).
If you haven’t read The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, I highly encourage it. I am going to post the description and one review from Amazon about the book. Now when I read the review from Publishers Weekly, part of the review resonated with me…”While many of her listeners and readers claim her unequivocal advice has salvaged teetering marriages and improved marital harmony, others perceive Schlessinger as a throwback to what many see as years of female oppression in the home.” The advice in this book does appear to take the women’s movement back a few years, but in the end with the few changes I’ve already started implementing, I can see a world of difference.
Book Description:
Women want to be in love, get married, and live happily ever after. Yet disrespect for men and disregard for the values, feelings, and needs of husbands has fast become the standard for male-female relations in America, often creating struggle and strife in what could be a beautiful relationship.
Countless women call Dr. Laura, unhappy in their marriages and seemingly at a loss to understand the incredible power they have over their men to create the kind of home life they yearn for. Now, in her most provocative book yet, Dr. Laura shows you—with real-life examples and real-life solutions—how to wield that power to attain all the sexual pleasure, intimacy, love, joy, and peace you want in your life.
Dr. Laura’s simple principles have already salvaged and revitalized innumerable strained, stagnant, even seemingly dead marriages and have changed the lives of millions. Now they can revitalize yours!
Book Review:
From Publishers Weekly
In her newest book, Schlessinger (10 Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives) relies upon her experience in private practice, radio and letters she received from men and women in tackling the issue of women who mistreat their men and suffer the consequences of unhappiness. The women who criticize their husbands in the stories that Schlessinger relates are depressed in their marriages and feel little love from their husbands. Unabashedly asserting that man is a “very simple creature,” who needs only “direct communication, respect, appreciation, food, and good loving’” to respond with devotion, compassion and love, this controversial marriage and family therapist claims that every woman can achieve a deeply satisfying marriage if she adheres to certain fundamentals men require. Preparing dinner, caring for the children without complaint, greeting her husband with a kiss and engaging in sexual intimacy instead of “tearing down a husband’s necessary sense of strength and importance” can result in the harmonious marriage women crave. While many of her listeners and readers claim her unequivocal advice has salvaged teetering marriages and improved marital harmony, others perceive Schlessinger as a throwback to what many see as years of female oppression in the home.
Tuesday Weigh In
As I stated last week I am involved in the Tales from the Scales May Day Challenge.
Ok, it’s time for my Tuesday weigh in…drum roll please…I’m down another 7 lbs. I started the challenge a little early (on April 28th), but I’m now down a total of 21 lbs. I’m not fad dieting, nor starving myself, instead I am following a wheat free/gluten free lifestyle. I still eat the same amount of food, just different food. My next goal is to work on my portion control and of course…exercise.
I feel so much better (I wonder if I had an intolerance to wheat) and I think I’m starting to look a little better too.
When Someone Has Questions, I Have Answers…OK Opinions
Heather recently had a list of random questions that she wanted answers to, so here I go.
1. If money and family were not an issue (meaning you have all the money in the world and your family will follow you anywhere), where would you want to live and why?
I don’t have an exact location in mind, however, I would love to be the owner of a small to medium sized (of course that’s relative) private island. Beach and solitude, what more could a girl want.
2. How do you feel about meeting people on the internet (ie. the REALLY cool bloggers that you’ve met in the past few weeks, months, years, etc.) Are you open to meeting them? How far would you extend the invitation? Lunch downtown? Dinner in your home? Spending the weekend? Why?
Believe it or not, yes I’m open to meeting them, no preference as to where. If they are half as cool in person as their blogs are, double heck yeah. Then the other person’s challenge is going to be getting me to open up in person.
3. Do you protect the innocent (or not so innocent) by changing their names when you talk about them on your blog?
Hmm….yes and no. My immediate family and friends, no. However I do hold back a little when explaining my son’s birth parents and a select few others.
4. What is your stance on posting pictures of your family and yourself on your blog? Why did you make this decision?
I love pictures and am a believer that they do speak a thousand words. Sometimes they are vital to getting your message across. While I don’t have any at present, I do look forward to sharing.
5. Who has made the BIGGEST impact on your life and why?
Jesus. Without Him I wouldn’t be where I am or the person I am today. He keeps me strong and grounded. That’s not to say that I don’t get down, because I am still human, but He is there to pick me up, brush me off and send me on my merry way again. 
Mother’s Day: A Tribute to Birth Moms
I usually take a break from blogging for the weekends, but I wanted to give a little shout to all the Mothers/Mommies/Step-Moms, etc., but especially the Birth Moms out there. You all are very special indeed. I’m going to share something very near and dear to my heart (shocking). I want to say thank you to a woman I’ll call Amber (name has been changed). Without you I wouldn’t be a MOM. I don’t know where you are now, but know that you’re never far away from my heart.
“Amber” gave us a wonderful present in late 2001, a telephone call. In the telephone call her mom said, “Amber is pregnant and would like to know if you both want to adopt her child.” My husband and I were like giddy school children, shouting at the top of our lungs, “YES, YES, YES.” So over the next few months we prepared for our little bundle of joy. Dale was excited because we would A. have a child, B. I wouldn’t have to undergo anymore rounds of fertility medications, tests, etc. which all proved to be futile and C. no more dealings with DSS and pricey international adoption agencies (which were truly out of our budget at the time).
Our little bundle was born in January 2002, with several health complications, some of which still affect him today (someday we’ll talk about those a little more). He is our pride and joy, but we remind him everyday that “Miss. Amber” loves him very much, that she is special and that she grew him just for us.
The story wouldn’t be complete if I did not take the opportunity to thank my extroverted mother-in-law, for without her too we would not have our son. See, she loves people, thrives on them. If she saw someone with a protruding belly and no wedding ring, they were fair game (yes I’m embarrassed to say). One day her attempts paid off and we were blessed with someone extraordinary.
“Amber” - there’s not a Mother’s Day (or day) that goes by that I don’t think of you and thank you for your precious gift to us. We love you very much!
Birth Moms - we love you! If it weren’t for you, there would be so many of us without our little bundles. You are miracles!
Moms - HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!!!
Becki
Thankful Thursday
My first Thankful Thursday post. WOOHOO!
As Mother’s Day draws near, I’m reminded about how much I love and admire my mother. I’m glad in many ways that I moved back to PA to be closer to her.
My husband has the patience of Job with me, what more could a woman want?
My son, oh so extroverted and energentic, keeps me on my toes and without him I would be lost.
We haven’t found a church home yet in PA, but I’m thankful that God is leading and is in control.
I love my friends in the box and the many blogs that keep me rolling.
My 15 lb weight loss…WHOOHOO!
I’m A Little Teapot
Sometimes I’m a teapot, shocking but true. I can easily be converted to a teapot when I deal with my extroverted son. As we read in yesterday’s blog post, he is famous for talking to strangers and putting me in some very awkward situations when out in public. Boy is a joy, but it’s very hard to parent an extroverted child when you’ve been surrounded by introverts your entire life. Boy is all boy, all energy and difficult to deal with if you’re not flooding him with constant contact. I love giving him the attention that he needs and requires, but by the end of the day I am drained, drained, drained.
Introvert Solutions
Believe it or not, I’m speechless. I have nothing to say. If you have a solution, let me know.
PS - Why am I sharing this with you? To be frank, I don’t quite know. There has to be others out there parenting a child who is your total opposite. I’m famous for advice to introverted business owners, but man, this parenting thing has me stumped. In my minds eye I believe that if it works in business it should work at home. But baby…it don’t.
A Little Out of Character
This is a little out of character for me, but I guess I want accountability. I have decided to join the May Challenge at Tales From The Scales. As far as weight to lose…I’m not quite sure how to answer that question. So far I have lost 15 lbs in the past two weeks by switching to a wheat free/gluten free diet. Because of the difference I feel, I am wondering if I do have some type of wheat sensitivity. I hope you’ll join me on this adventure.
Random Facts About Me…
I was tagged by Heather of Desperately Seeking Sanity. Thanks…I think.
Here are the rules. Each player starts with seven random facts about themselves. People who are tagged need to write on their own blog about the seven things and the rules. You need to choose seven people to tag and list their names. Don’t forget to leave them a comment that they have been tagged and to read your blog!
7 Random Facts About Me…
1. I once broke down in South Hackensack, NJ with a pregnant lady, a man at his wits end, a lilac point Siamese (being delivered to Boston) and was forced to stay in a hotel that rented by the hour on Christmas none-the-less. I was 8 and the pregnant lady was my mom, the man at his wits end was my step-father, the lilac point Siamese was Kiko (my grandmother’s new cat) and for the life of me I can’t remember the motel’s name. Needless to say I was scarred for life by this experience. The only restaurant open on Christmas was the Chinese restaurant that had NO POWER so we dined on pea pods by candle light. I think my parents shielded me from the horrors of the rent-by-the-hour-seediness.
2. I’m in the process of writing a cookbook, complete with my own recipes, no regurgitation here. I love to cook and I’m darn good at it too, now if only the Food Network would pick me up.
3. The most embarrassing thing I’ve ever done…I sucked the big toe of a radio disc jockey for 2 tickets to an Aerosmith concert.
1. I was young (20)
2. I was stupid (again…20)
3. Yes, the big toe was clean
4. Believe it or not, my snotty cat has his own blog called The Life of a Cat and he’s actually pretty funny. He’s bugging me for a MySpace profile and his own line of “Craptacular Cat Litter”.
5. I adopted an EXTROVERT child at birth who challenges me to step out of my comfort zone each and every day. He can make friends at the grocery store or on the street and even invites strangers and vagrants to our house. Like two weeks ago we went for a walk. Boy was talking to said stranger for about 3 blocks. Next thing I know said stranger is following us up the stairs to our apartment. HELLO! DUDE! Boy is 5 and just making conversation. Out darn spot out I say! I think everyone is now privy to where we live.
6. I wanted to be a nun until I was 9. Yes I’m being serious. Then I was told that I would never have a boyfriend, have sex or have a baby, so I changed my mind and wanted to be the next Dr. Ruth. Truth be told, I think I wanted to get a rise out of the nuns…it worked.
7. My BFF is Celiac so I started researching the disease and came across some very interesting information which made me wonder if I too suffered from a sensitivity to wheat. I made the switch to a wheat free/gluten free lifestyle. So far in two weeks I’ve lost 15 pounds, I have more energy and ummm….hmmmm…..my “IBS” has just about disappeared.
Now I have to pick seven? Come on people, I’m introverted and live in a box. Hmmm, who are the lucky ones?
* Karen @ Kreative Ramblings
* Rose @ Expert Business Results
* Dale @ Dale’s Ramblings
* Lisa @ Potty Prayers
* Fi Fi @ The Life of a Cat
I’m a rule breaker by nature, so I’m doing just five.
Introvert…Surprise, Surprise
I was looking at another blog and I saw “what’s your bloginality”, needless to say I couldn’t resist.
My Bloginality is ISFP!!!
Wow! What a shocker!
So, what’s your “bloginality”?
A Day Off For Birthdays and Thankfulness
Today we’re taking a day off for two special reasons.
Today is Lisa B’s birthday, so let’s give her a little love by visiting her blogs, Potty Prayers and Simply His, and giving her birthday wishes.
Next, let’s celebrate with Especially Heather. Her zest for life and courageous spirit help to ignite me on fire!
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Big Thank You!
